It's official!!! We're moving to Texas. Dan was offered a job at DELL and we have had an offer accepted on the house we really like. So now...as we prepare to move I feel like I have so much more to think about than I ever thought I would. Besides the logistics of the actual move like moving our stuff, moving our cars, getting Charleigh and I down there the least difficult way possible, being 31 weeks pregnant...etc,I am probably most worried about how it will affect her. Luckily my project manager husband is looking at this move like a project ( very small project compared to the other projects he's managed) and is taking a lot of the stressful decisions away from me. This has given me the ability to worry most about Charleigh and her reaction to everything. She'll be too young to remember living here but also too young to understand why we've moved. I just keep telling myself that as long as her momma and dada are there along with her dog and her toys, she should be a happy girl. We'll leave our house, go to my parents while our stuff is en route to Texas and then arrive the day after our stuff does down there. I can't seem to think of a way to make sure she realizes that we need to say goodbye to our house, yard, and neighborhood because we wont be back, but that it's okay. I think I'm so concerned because I want her to feel settled and comfortable in her new home before we flip her world upside down again in July and bring home a sibling for her. Maybe the new addition will make it feel more like home, at least that's what I am hoping. I'm hoping she will like her new room, spend time exploring the new house, be thrilled with her new big play area, and her new backyard. I'm also hoping we make new friends quickly so that we can be out and about which is how Charleigh seems to be happiest.
I think I need to let my anxiety turn into excitement and accept this new chapter of our lives. Just wish I could turn off my "worry wart" syndrome. :-(
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Another milestone
Charleigh will be 17 months old tomorrow. So I knew that it was well past the time when she should have given up the bottle. Even though she has only been getting one only at night for quite a few weeks now, I knew the night time one would be the hardest for her to let go of. It surprised me how dependent she had become on the bottle for sleep time because for the first 10 months she was almost exclusively breastfed and pretty much rejected any and all bottles. (we bougtht several different kinds). But as it was, she had come to know that when one of us came in with the bottle after stories it was going to be time to go to sleep. I realize this is a big milestone for many babies/toddlers. I had spent the first 10 months of her life thinking that it wouldn't be a challenge for us since she was so resistant to even taking a bottle. Unfortunately once she started biting me and seemed unable to figure out a way to breastfeed without biting she quickly adapted to a bottle. And so the trouble began.
As I sit here, I'm waiting the negotiated 10 mins before I go in and try to console her. She's crying...mostly the " I want someone to come in here with what I want" cry, but it's obviously fake and forced. It still breaks my heart. Last night was the first night of changing the bottle out for a sippy cup. She drinks the sippy cup no problem while being read her story but wants no part of it coming into her room with her. Yesterday had went very smoothly, but yesterday she had been what we call "just tired enough" to want to sleep more than arguing for a bottle. There are times when she's not quite ready for bed and there are the times when she's overly tired. Both of which make for a difficult bedtime.
I should have prefaced this whole posting with the fact that she's never been a great sleeper. She's always been what they call a " high need baby" and needed one or two or three "sleep crutches" to help her get to sleep. Slowly but surely we've slowly broken her of each one. She was also the child who was up every 2-3 hours without fail until about the 10 month mark. (Here's to hoping that 2.0 is much less needy in that department).
I know in a couple weeks this will be yet another milestone that I read over when I'm updating her baby book. But tonight it seems like such a tough thing for such a little person to go though. :-(
Let me just say how happy, elated and thrilled I am that she NEVER took to a pacifier!!
That's one milestone we don't have to worry about!
As I sit here, I'm waiting the negotiated 10 mins before I go in and try to console her. She's crying...mostly the " I want someone to come in here with what I want" cry, but it's obviously fake and forced. It still breaks my heart. Last night was the first night of changing the bottle out for a sippy cup. She drinks the sippy cup no problem while being read her story but wants no part of it coming into her room with her. Yesterday had went very smoothly, but yesterday she had been what we call "just tired enough" to want to sleep more than arguing for a bottle. There are times when she's not quite ready for bed and there are the times when she's overly tired. Both of which make for a difficult bedtime.
I should have prefaced this whole posting with the fact that she's never been a great sleeper. She's always been what they call a " high need baby" and needed one or two or three "sleep crutches" to help her get to sleep. Slowly but surely we've slowly broken her of each one. She was also the child who was up every 2-3 hours without fail until about the 10 month mark. (Here's to hoping that 2.0 is much less needy in that department).
I know in a couple weeks this will be yet another milestone that I read over when I'm updating her baby book. But tonight it seems like such a tough thing for such a little person to go though. :-(
Let me just say how happy, elated and thrilled I am that she NEVER took to a pacifier!!
That's one milestone we don't have to worry about!
Saturday, April 16, 2011
Selling the house
In Feb 2008 Dan and I closed on our current home. We were lucky enough to have until April to get things ready at the new house before actually moving in. We had time to paint, lay new carpet, install new appliances, and clean. It was nice to move in and feel like we really had time to put everything together. So now as we put the house up for sale I'm wondering if we'll ever have that opportunity again. Not only do we plan to make a move over hundreds of miles but there is even a chance that I won't see this new house in person until the day I move in. That fact feels both exciting and nerve wracking at the same time. During our move into this house we had a 13 week old puppy that made things slightly more complicated. I am very worried about how I'll get a house prepared to live in with an almost 2 yr old and a newborn. I have a feeling we'll be living out of boxes for longer than I want to admit. I HATE THAT THOUGHT!! I'm the type who can't relax once I get home from somewhere until I unpack, sort the laundry, put stuff away and regroup for being home.
We've put a sign in our yard, emailed some realtors, made a facebook page, posted it on craigslist and on several FSBO websites. We've had one showing in this two week period. And we have another realtor coming out Monday night to check the place out. While I realize everything can't happen at the exact same time I'm trying to figure out how we'll move, find a new house, Dan will find a job, and we'll have a baby during all of this?!?!?!
I'd be happy to hear from anyone who has had a similar experience and had this all work out.
We've put a sign in our yard, emailed some realtors, made a facebook page, posted it on craigslist and on several FSBO websites. We've had one showing in this two week period. And we have another realtor coming out Monday night to check the place out. While I realize everything can't happen at the exact same time I'm trying to figure out how we'll move, find a new house, Dan will find a job, and we'll have a baby during all of this?!?!?!
I'd be happy to hear from anyone who has had a similar experience and had this all work out.
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Round 2
When I found out I was pregnant with the little baby that would become Charleigh I felt lots of emotions. First I was excited, then worried, then overwhelmed. I wanted to make sure I ate the right foods, took the right medicines and took care of myself the best I could. I worried about whether or not I'd be a good mom, if I'd know what to do for her, what her cries meant, when to react and when to let her figure something out with a little patience. Now that she's 16 months old I realize that I am still learning everyday how to be a good mother to her. Ironically though, it doesn't seem to calm my fears about being a good mother to whom we're referring to as 2.0. (it's going to be a surprise again). While some of the "first time mom" fears aren't there, there seem to be just as many this time around. Will this child react to me the way Charleigh does? Will I compare this baby to Charleigh?? Will I have enough time to feel as though I can love and care for both kids in equal amounts?
Everyone who has more than one child has told me that the love just multiplies. They say that you'll love each child in different ways for different reasons and that while the love may be different it will always be special and equal. While I believe these statements, it's hard to even fathom having the amount of love for another child that I currently have for Charleigh.
My start to stay-at-home motherhood wasn't the easiest. I always LOVED her, but I didn't have that immediate connection that so many mothers speak of with their child. Yet somehow I feel like that rough start has made our mother-daughter relationship EVEN stronger now because I can remember and look back at how she almost SHOCKED me into motherhood. In addition to my somewhat common post partum issues I also dealt with a lack of socialization that I wasn't prepared for. I had enjoyed my previous job, talking with coworkers and students on a daily basis. Charleigh was cute but she was anything but a conversationalist. I had no stay-at-home mom friends to spend time with or talk to. I actually didn't meet ANY of the wonderful mommies I know now until Charleigh was almost 7 months old. Don't get me wrong, I knew plenty of women (coworkers and friends) that were moms, but they weren't stay-at-home moms who were available during the day when I needed some moments of sanity and support. I am confident that specific hurdle will not be there this time as both Charleigh and I have developed some great relationships with mommies and babies/toddlers to help us get through those first few weeks of having a new baby in our lives. But I am realistic to realize that while that difficulty may not be there, there will more than likely be a new one in its place.
As I think about what some of those future struggles may be I realize that they will ultimately be some of the most worth while challenges I will face as a mother and person. Even though some days are very tiring and trying I know that I am very lucky to get to stay at home with me child (soon to be children). I know that my kids need ME as their mom and I believe I am the best person they can have to spend their days with. To teach them, encourage them, discipline them and LOVE them. More importantly I realize that while I may not get to/need to buy new shoes or new clothes all the time for example (something I used to enjoy) I get to spend the some of the most formative and influential years getting to know and helping to mold a little life. Almost everyday something happens between Charleigh and I and I think to myself " I'm so happy that I get to be the one to share this with her, I can't imagine someone else being the one to experience this". I know the days are numbered that she will want or need me in her life in this capacity and I want to know that I got the most of these times. I want to be able to look back and pictures with her ( since I take hundreds) and tell her about how she was at a certain age, or the silly things she did, or the fun things we did together. I want Charleigh and her sibling to know that their daddy worked hard, pretty much from the moment I met him, to ensure that he would be an amazing provider and allow for the mother of his children to be there to share their days with them. I want them to know that while mommy did have a very different life before they were born, that staying at home with them was a choice I made and continued to make everyday out of love and dedication to them and a strong family.
So as Round 2 approaches I'm trying to rest up, strengthen myself (emotionally and mentally) and prepare for all the unpredictable blows that will come with a newborn and a 20 month old filling my days.
Everyone who has more than one child has told me that the love just multiplies. They say that you'll love each child in different ways for different reasons and that while the love may be different it will always be special and equal. While I believe these statements, it's hard to even fathom having the amount of love for another child that I currently have for Charleigh.
My start to stay-at-home motherhood wasn't the easiest. I always LOVED her, but I didn't have that immediate connection that so many mothers speak of with their child. Yet somehow I feel like that rough start has made our mother-daughter relationship EVEN stronger now because I can remember and look back at how she almost SHOCKED me into motherhood. In addition to my somewhat common post partum issues I also dealt with a lack of socialization that I wasn't prepared for. I had enjoyed my previous job, talking with coworkers and students on a daily basis. Charleigh was cute but she was anything but a conversationalist. I had no stay-at-home mom friends to spend time with or talk to. I actually didn't meet ANY of the wonderful mommies I know now until Charleigh was almost 7 months old. Don't get me wrong, I knew plenty of women (coworkers and friends) that were moms, but they weren't stay-at-home moms who were available during the day when I needed some moments of sanity and support. I am confident that specific hurdle will not be there this time as both Charleigh and I have developed some great relationships with mommies and babies/toddlers to help us get through those first few weeks of having a new baby in our lives. But I am realistic to realize that while that difficulty may not be there, there will more than likely be a new one in its place.
As I think about what some of those future struggles may be I realize that they will ultimately be some of the most worth while challenges I will face as a mother and person. Even though some days are very tiring and trying I know that I am very lucky to get to stay at home with me child (soon to be children). I know that my kids need ME as their mom and I believe I am the best person they can have to spend their days with. To teach them, encourage them, discipline them and LOVE them. More importantly I realize that while I may not get to/need to buy new shoes or new clothes all the time for example (something I used to enjoy) I get to spend the some of the most formative and influential years getting to know and helping to mold a little life. Almost everyday something happens between Charleigh and I and I think to myself " I'm so happy that I get to be the one to share this with her, I can't imagine someone else being the one to experience this". I know the days are numbered that she will want or need me in her life in this capacity and I want to know that I got the most of these times. I want to be able to look back and pictures with her ( since I take hundreds) and tell her about how she was at a certain age, or the silly things she did, or the fun things we did together. I want Charleigh and her sibling to know that their daddy worked hard, pretty much from the moment I met him, to ensure that he would be an amazing provider and allow for the mother of his children to be there to share their days with them. I want them to know that while mommy did have a very different life before they were born, that staying at home with them was a choice I made and continued to make everyday out of love and dedication to them and a strong family.
So as Round 2 approaches I'm trying to rest up, strengthen myself (emotionally and mentally) and prepare for all the unpredictable blows that will come with a newborn and a 20 month old filling my days.
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